A response to "A total makeover"...

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Uuuhhh... my stomach hurts... But it isn't hurting due to me having some sort of illness. Actually, it hurts because I've stuffed it full with food. I ate at 10 p.m. just now, and even though it's 3 and a half hours later, I still feel full... That must've been quite a meal. What did I eat? I ate a KFC Dinner Plate: 3 pieces of chicken, 1 small coleslaw, 1 small mashed potatoes with gravy, and around 2 glasses of Neslo Ais. Huhuhu... memang patut sangat la aku rasa camni.

Now what am I gonna write about tonight... First of all, before I continue: I notice that my readership has greatly expanded! I'm receiving, on average, around 12 visitors per day. Wow, that is a lot. And to think they came all the way to read about things that an average guy like me would write. Heh. Nevertheless, I feel really happy and grateful that what I write here is being noticed by my friends. I love you guys! Thanks! :)

I think I should write a response to the image change thingy i posted a few days ago. Thanks to those that wrote in, and from what I read, most of you guys agreed that I do look skema. Hehehe... finally what I feel all this while is vindicated (sorry for the flowery word - it means justified - just trying to improve my vocabulary!). Also, most of you guys feel that I should not change. Instead, I shouldn't care what others feel about me, and just be myself. Only a fraud would change for the sake of others, quoting the words of abu himself. And also, you guys are thinking that I'm in a middle-age crisis.

Okay, now, my responses. Yes, I do look skema, that I agree, but as I commented in the post itself, I know changing this skema look would just be superficial. I mean, it'll mean nothing much. However, I feel that it will change my first impression and lets others take a second look at me (wow, that'll be something new!), instead of just glancing once at me and thinking "Uh huh," and looking away. I don't want people to judge me by the cover of my book. I want them to look deeper into its contents. But the reality of life is that people do judge by first impression. That's why I'm trying to improve my first impression by trying to shed my skema image. I hope it'll work.

Next, as abu said, I shouldn't try to change for others' sake. I should just be myself. Yup, that's what I'm actually trying to do. I'm trying to change my image, but at the same time, I want that image to still represent what I am, not just some phoney image I copy from others. I want that new image of mine to be something that really highlights my good qualities while maybe hiding the not-so-good ones. I think the best thing to do is to try and improve on the bad qualities that I have, such as being too quiet and reserved, and also highlight more of my good features.

Middle-age crisis? Heh. I have no answer for that. But, somehow, I agree with you. Maybe I am in some sort of problem, but not sure whether it's really a middle-age or some other type of crisis. How would one know if one is in one?

There, I think I've responded well enough. My decision? I'm gonna take it slow. I will change, but it'll be a slow and gradual change. An evolution, instead of a revolution. But in the end, hopefully, it'll be a new me. Not necessarily a better me, but at least a refreshingly new me. :)


Posted by Nikman Shah at 1:08 am
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